Lake District chippy owner tells complainers to ‘stick their battered sausage up their a***’

The owner of a fish and chip shop in the Lake District has responded to several online reviews by publicly telling unhappy customers to ‘f*** off elsewhere’ if they complain.

The world of TripAdvisor and Google Reviews means that unhappy (and happy) customers can leave honest reviews of any premises or service they have paid for, freely and publicly, on the internet.

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The Old Smithy fish and chip shop at The Slack in Ambleside has previously been called the ‘Best fish and chips in Ambleside’ according to visitors on TripAdvisor, and its owner, Gary, isn’t too happy about any reviews that say anything less.

In their Google reviews, Gary takes the time to reply to nearly all of the reviews of The Old Smithy – good and bad.

To one happy customer who said Gary was a ‘hero’ serving food ‘on par with Michelin star restaurants’, Gary replied: “No sorry Michelin star is another level of cooking but thanks for giving us 5 stars, Regards Gary.”

On another occasion, a customer left Gary a shining review that said the fish and chips were ‘good’ and ‘the place to go’ in Ambleside, but only rated The Old Smithy four out of five stars.

Gary replied: “Thanks for a good review, how do we move it to a 5. Regards Gary.”

However, its on the lower ratings that Gary is keen to put customers in their place. In some responses, Gary will even call reviewers ‘f*****s’.

A month ago, The Old Smithy received a two-star review from a user named Ben. He felt the fish was ‘cooked poorly in sunflower oil’, was ‘weedy in taste’ and advised prospective diners to ‘avoid this place’.

Gary replied: “Oh look another f****r thinks they know best. Well you can stick your opinion up your a***.

“You’re wrong we don’t use sunflower oil who the hell would you complete idiot as for the rest of your rant I’m really not interested in your opinion as you’re just one of those annoying f**ks so do us all a favour and f**k off.”

Gary ended his reply with: “Thanks. Regards Gary the owner of a very well respected fish and chip shop and trust me I know how to fry a f***ing fish as I fry in excess of 100,000 fish in just one year and I’ve been in this trade for 20yrs so your entire review is so wrong but you’re so ignorant you can’t ever see why [sic].”

A week ago, another customer under the name ‘Master Tee Tee’ left a two star review that claimed the food served at The Old Smithy was ‘bits’ and offered to show Gary ‘how to cook fish and chips’.

Gary responded last night (October 13), writing: “Thanks Master Baiter, I feel very sorry for you being such a sad t***. I really don’t need any advice off you I promise our repeat customers of which there are thousands appreciate my efforts and would be very annoyed if I changed my technique now after nearly 20 years of frying.

In their Google reviews, Gary takes the time to reply to nearly all of the reviews of The Old Smithy - good and bad. 
In their Google reviews, Gary takes the time to reply to nearly all of the reviews of The Old Smithy – good and bad. 

“Basically it’s like this I couldn’t give one f*** of how you think I run my business.”

Unusually to his typical sign off, Gary ended his response to the unhappy customer with: “Regards from a no name oops I do have a name its Gary and let me guess yours is it Sir w*** stain.”

Gary responded to a user named Kyle who left a one star review that claimed the customer service was ‘appalling’ after they were ‘out right told’ they would not served battered sausage.

“First Kyle go back to school and learn how to spell you drop out t***. You wanted battered sausage and were told very politely that no sorry we just had plain sausages and we were too busy or it was closing time.

He continued: “So you can take your unbattered sausage and stick it right up your a***. Regarding your appalling customer service comment we always respond to f**** like you within 4hrs. Regards Gary.”

And then, Gary added: “PS f*** off elsewhere in future.”

Sometimes, Gary’s ruthless responses can be more simple.

Stephen, who left a review a month ago, said it ‘used to be a great place to eat’ but under Gary’s ownership it is allegedly now run by ‘father and ignorant son’ that provide a ‘terrible service’. He advised visitors to visit another fish and chip shop.

Gary replied: “Go and f*** yourself Stephen. Don’t come in my shop again EVER got it. Regards the ignorant t*** Gary”

To Rosie, who left a review two months ago and said the fish was ‘dry and overcooked’, Gary said: “We cook our fish on a timer to avoid under or overcooking our fish so I disagree with your opinion. Regards Gary.”

Despite this, Gary still takes the time to thank those who leave him stunning reviews about his ‘lovely fish and chips’.

Lancs Live tried to make contact with Gary at the Old Smithy but he did not answer the phone.

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